ShortsRated PG
(Mild action and some rude humor)
1 hr 29 minutes
Storyline:
A young boy's discovery of a colorful, wish-granting rock causes chaos in the suburban town of Black Falls when jealous kids and scheming adults alike set out to get their hands on it.
Starring:
Jimmy Bennett
Trevor Gagnon
Jolie Vanier
James Spader
Leslie Mann
Jon Cryer
William H. Macy
Critics Grade:
D+
My (adult mindset) Grade:
D+
My (kid at heart mindset) Grade:
C+
OK when you see a movie like Shorts, and your an adult you cannot possibly critique the film from your normal adult mindset. That is just plain silly. You have to understand going into the movie that this is a film meant for children. It is not meant to entertain adults. It is meant for adults to waste their money on so their kids can get out of the house and see a flick. But if you are an adult and going to see this movie without kids (like me and buddy Matt did today...I don't know why) you cannot, cannot, CANNOT be a snob when it comes to reviewing this movie unless you are going to it from the mindset of the target audience: children.
That being said, I will give you my quick adult mindset review of the film. This movie was stupid. It lacked any kind of charm or entertaining value. The dialog was so cheesy and horrendous and it was NOT funny in the least. I don't think I laughed from any of the jokes at all. The kids were OK, but the adults were much better. The only thing I really liked about the movie was Emmy winner James Spader (TV's Boston Legal). He was pretty similar to his Alan Shore character and I thought he was pretty good for the crap writing he had to deal with. But his sinister character didn't have many corny lines to deliver, his were alright.
But in all honestly...disregard that last paragraph...it doesn't matter what I think from an adult mindset about this movie. Of course it's going to be dumb! Now from a child's standpoint...I think this movie would be pretty entertaining for any kid age 5-12 (12 may be pushing it). But there were at least 10 kids in the audience today (it was not a packed house) and I really didn't hear much laughter. There was never a moment where all the kids laughed at once. There was a chuckle here, a chuckle there but no kid in my theater genuinely laughed at any part of the movie. So I base my kid like review off of that.
I think it will be pretty fun in a kid's eyes, but I don't know if many kids will honestly love this movie. A lot of the humor seemed to whiz right by the children in this audience (as it did the adults too) but some funny parts snuck in for them. The movie has kid like special effects (nothing to scary), and it's pretty faced paced. There aren't many slow or boring parts that kids would be restless in. So I mean...yeah, take your kids to see it...I don't think they would be dissapointed, I just don't think they will want you to buy it for them when it's out on DVD.
Not really to much to say about this movie though. From my snobby adult mindset though...this movie sucks. Haha.
That being said, I will give you my quick adult mindset review of the film. This movie was stupid. It lacked any kind of charm or entertaining value. The dialog was so cheesy and horrendous and it was NOT funny in the least. I don't think I laughed from any of the jokes at all. The kids were OK, but the adults were much better. The only thing I really liked about the movie was Emmy winner James Spader (TV's Boston Legal). He was pretty similar to his Alan Shore character and I thought he was pretty good for the crap writing he had to deal with. But his sinister character didn't have many corny lines to deliver, his were alright.
But in all honestly...disregard that last paragraph...it doesn't matter what I think from an adult mindset about this movie. Of course it's going to be dumb! Now from a child's standpoint...I think this movie would be pretty entertaining for any kid age 5-12 (12 may be pushing it). But there were at least 10 kids in the audience today (it was not a packed house) and I really didn't hear much laughter. There was never a moment where all the kids laughed at once. There was a chuckle here, a chuckle there but no kid in my theater genuinely laughed at any part of the movie. So I base my kid like review off of that.I think it will be pretty fun in a kid's eyes, but I don't know if many kids will honestly love this movie. A lot of the humor seemed to whiz right by the children in this audience (as it did the adults too) but some funny parts snuck in for them. The movie has kid like special effects (nothing to scary), and it's pretty faced paced. There aren't many slow or boring parts that kids would be restless in. So I mean...yeah, take your kids to see it...I don't think they would be dissapointed, I just don't think they will want you to buy it for them when it's out on DVD.
Not really to much to say about this movie though. From my snobby adult mindset though...this movie sucks. Haha.
This movie did seem pretty silly even by kid standards. One to put on my "maybe watch on cable" list.
ReplyDeleteWow, no wonder I never heard of it. I'm one of those "Goonies" types. I adore that movie. On a rainy day, it's one of the first ones I want to see.
ReplyDeleteI like your honest and good review of the film "Shorts". The two best things about the film were James Spader (naturally, he is always good) and Jolie Vanier as Helvetica, otherwise there was little to recommend it. I saw the film twice (I know, why?)and I did seem to enjoy it better the second time. Just like in your case the children in the theatre chuckled a little, but there was not any uproarous laughter from them at any place in the film...too bad because it was a waste of some very talented adult actors. I guess they all wanted to check out Robert Rodriguez's studio in Austin and see how he went about making films, otherwise what were James Spader and William H. Macy doing in a film like this?
ReplyDeleteYeah Julie...it won't hurt to watch it for free on cable one day if NOTHING else is on lol. Watch it for Spader if anything.
ReplyDeleteAutumn I know exactly what you mean..."Goonies" is one of the all time greatest live action "kid/family" films of all time. Then you have "Honey I Shrunk the Kids", "Little Rascals", stuff like that. They just don't make movies like they used to!
Anonymous...thank you very much for your comment!! Even though I don't know who you are lol. But I very much agree with you! I have no idea what Spader and Macy were thinking! They are too good for this! Even Leslie Mann was an odd choice! Hell I even thought Jon Cryer was bizarre to be in this! I also didn't like that weird theme music they had for Helvetica...little to strange for me.